Today I had the most weird dream..
I dreamed they all came to my house and we start to play a game like "true or consequence", when the game ends, he sat beside me and he had all the sofa ... he began to get ever-closer to me, and we were almost kissing and he told me: " do you want to be with him, really?" and I said " It will be better if you talk tomorrow" , he says " that's ok", and when I look in front of me, I saw him and he was looking for us, and he ran away from my room,and in that moment I understood that it was all over... and I felt very sorry for the situation...
It was a dream and a nightmare at the same time...
A dream because he still cares about me, and we started talking again, but a nightmare because i had lost my love.
I can't stay far away from you.. i really need you in my life, in all my days, in all the seconds...
You're one the most important persons in this world to me.
You're the one who make me smile a lot.
You're the one who protects me a lot.
You're the one who loves me like no one does.
I'm habituated to see a message from you all the mornings, and all the nights before go sleep.
I can't imagine if i lose you someday.. And If our relationship ends? i just want you to know that you're the person who I had loved the most..that you're really really important to me.
I only feel confortable with you, I feel like I'm home.
And when I'm hugging you? oh... is so fantastic.
When I'm kissing you? I lose all my memories, and I just think about you, you and you.
To be honest, I'm always thinking about you.
twenty three of september of two thousand and thirteen ♥
i remember when i started crying in my sofa, when I felt like i'm a terrible person, i felt like it was all my fault, I felt so insecure, I started biting and scratching my body, I felt the world falling apart underneath me, I felt like I had nothing, I started thinking about all our messages, our talks, our hugs, our kisses, our cumplicity, our smiles, our looks.... I started thinking all about I lost in that moment, and when I thought about this I cryed more and more. And in todays, i still miss you, but not in the same way, I miss our friendship and our talks, I miss talking to you for hours, and especially I miss the time we smile for eachother without thinking about the bad things that happened. Now I can say that I have a very good person with me, I know he really loves me, believe me, he treats me so fine, he cares about me, he remembers me all the time, I'm always in his mind, I know that.
He means the world to me, he makes me really happy,more than you did, sorry.
But I know, that you know, that I still care and think about you, but do you think that I still love you? it's not true. I have a big affection for you, because you marked my life, and you have broked my heart, but it doesn't hurt anymore.
Now I feel safe, happy, i'm in love with him, and finally I'm not in love with you anymore. But you can be happy because I don't think you were a mistake, I'm not sorry for had stayed with you those times. It was a great experience, and I was happy with you, this is true too.
I want that you be happy, I want that we start talking again like friends, and especially I want to forget that bad things I still remember, all the times that I see you.
